Crippled By Guilt: Healing The Feminine Mother Wound
Note: see this article here for a review of how to heal wounded feminine energies, and this article here for impotent men looking to heal the wounded masculine energies.
Just to be clear: I am not a woman, and I will never know exactly what it feels like and means to be a woman.
However I know from the women in my life that women all over this planet are in pain and silently suffering.
In my life, some of the best mentors and guides have been women, and in act of thankfulness and appreciation, I’ve written this article to give something back, and help how I can.
We’re going to be exploring the mother wound, and how it impacts women and their feminine energies, and how women can heal from it and reclaim their power.
The mother wound leaves many women an empty shell of what they could be, and my hope is this article provides some guidance on the journey to liberation.
What Is The Mother Wound?
The mother wound is often inflicted when the woman was a young girl. Her mother would criticize and guilt her – nothing was ever good enough. The young girl feeling helpless, did everything she could to please her mother, but it was never enough. This left her with a feeling of emptiness, that should get never fulfil.
Alternatively, the mother may have abandoned her, leaving her alone to fend for herself. With no clear role models in her life, she forge her way through life on her one. She developed a thick skin of armour to protect her from the world, but deep down there still remains a terrified little girl.
This video by Terri Cole explores what the mother wound is, how in manifests itself, and how it subtly or not so subtly influences your life:
The Wounded Feminine
The mother wound led to a damaged and wounded feminine. The girl not feeling confident in herself, grew up to be an insecure woman, always seeking the attention and affection of others. Feeling unable to validate herself, she would cling to any validation she could get, from boys that were no good for her, or from her instagram followers
In a move to reclaim your inner power, this video by Jillz Guerin, reveals how you can tap into your dark feminine. Most women avoid connecting with their dark feminine, but Jillz argues that you need to connect with your dark side if you want to heal your light side:
Healing The Mother Wound
Healing the mother wound is not simple. It takes time and patience. One must be persistent, but do rest assured there is light at the end of the tunnel.
The process starts with being okay with expressing your pain, of re-learning how to love yourself, and most of all of forgiveness, both of yourself and of your mother.
While it may seem difficult to believe in this moment, your mother did do the best that she was able to with the tools and resources she had available.
No mother actively wants to inflict pain on their child.
To go deeper – this video by Terri Cole deep dives into 7 ways that women can begin healing their mother wounds:
Wounded Masculine Energy In A Female
Some women also experience wounded masculine energy. This often arises from a father who was either absent, or refused to express love fully. This left the young girl feeling abandoned an insecure. As she grew up, she developed her own masculine energy as a shield against the harshness of the world.
Having a strong masculine presence helps her to better attract new opportunities into her life, including business opportunities and wealth. Unfortunately, as she worked so hard to express her masculine, the feminine inside her died and wilted away.
What Causes Wounded Feminine Energy
Wounded feminine energy likely emerged in childhood from being abandoned or being surrounded by toxic energy. Irresponsible parents can inflict immense damage that they may not even be aware of, through either abandoning their child, or not being present enough to provide the love they really needed.
Often times there was no support network and she was forced to fend for herself. She had to do everything herself, and take care of herself, and if she had siblings, to look out for her siblings.
From a very young age she had to put on her ‘big girl pants’ and put on a strong face to the world.
And while outwardly she may have appeared brave and on top of things. Inwardly she felt broken and scared. She was responsible for taking care of everyone else, but who was going to take care of her? There was something important that she knew was missing.
Healing The Wounded Feminine
Remember to be kind to yourself and stay on top of your boundaries. Don’t let others push you around, or tell you what exactly you should be feeling. This is your journey after all, remember that, and remember how much power you have inside yourself.
This video by Jillz Guerin reveals how women can tap into and connect with their inner confidence, and become the fullest expression of themselves. The wounded feminine hides, the healthy feminine is out and proud:
Healing Wounded Feminine Energy
Leaning to self-soothe can be an important skill during this journey. By being able to be your own mother, to look after yourself, and to love yourself, you can start the journey of forgiveness, and letting those past traumas go.
Healing The Feminine Wound
Healing the feminine wound is a process. And in severe cases may require professional help and a therapist.
It starts by acknowledging that any emotional absence from your parents was not your fault. You didn’t cause it, and you weren’t responsible for it as a little girl.
Get to know yourself, love yourself, be one with yourself.
This video by Jillz Guerin reveals how women can bravely step into their own power. By embracing who they are fully, women are able to show up in the world confidently. The feminine is strong, and will always escape from the shackles of the wounded feminine.
We all experience femininity and masculinity differently, and we all had different upbringings from our childhoods.
While our parents always did their best, sometimes their actions left us bruised and broken, and we were forced to pick up the pieces ourselves.
And while this process feels painful, I’d like to add a little silver lining that sometimes experiencing hardships, helps the rest of life feel easier to manage. Similar to how we prefer children to get chickenpox while they’re young, as it becomes deadly when they’re older.
By having survived earlier traumas, it gives us the strength to handle the next challenge that comes our way.
It’s not an excuse for bad behaviour, but simply a reminder that survivors are strong.
To your success and your journey,